“Tips to Improve your Inner Game, by Sam Ben-David”

Hey Party People

Thought i would share with you a Guest Post i did for Matthew Graham’s  Tru Confidence Blog a few months ago. His website is down so you cant view where it is, get it back up Matt . Hope you enjoy it guys.

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Ah Inner Game, i get wet at the thought of Inner Game (seriously my pants are wet right now, from willy dribble though!) Inner Game is seen to be more important to some than outer game, but some also see it as meaning nothing (Charming Rogue for example believes this).

I  could sit here for hours writing about it, but that would leave us all with bad backs and bursting bladders, so lets keep it simple and to the point .

To begin with….Inner Game to me is something that should effect every area of your life, not just with women. So when you try to improve your inner psychology, don’t just practice in scenario’s with women, practice in all areas. Maybe split them into 2 categories ; Social and Non Social. Social being anything you do with people, Non-Social being things like jumping off cliffs and cranking up the bench press weight by more than you usually do.

First tip of Inner Game:

Do Not Plan A Single Thing

As i write this….i have nothing planned, nothing at all, everything is freestyle’d.  When i speak in front of 40 people or 100 people, i do not plan a thing. Why? For a few reasons, first…if you plan something you lose the possibility of being creative, spontaneous and above all you are not in the moment*. If your goal is to get from A to B…. then you may miss what is in between A to B! The whole point of all this shit is that you are you and NOT ROUTINED, you are not a replica of the person who’s book you read…. If i meet one more guy with a shaved head or goggles on…i will probably kill them…emotionally not physically

Second….if you plan then that means you risk feeling more negative emotions before you do the task. Negative emotions come from your brain….so how you get them is through thinking, meaning that if you are not planning then you are not thinking, so your brain doesn’t know whats coming. Get it? And if that still makes you nervous then get a plain piece of white paper, put it on your wall and say to it everyday, “This is what i fear”. It will confuse your brain and get rid of fear of the unknown.

Second Tip

Be in the moment*

Arguably the greatest thing i ever discovered is a little book called The Power of Now, ohhh myyy gooood i fucking love that book!!! Its sick. Anyway….being in the moment is more important than you realise, everything i said above you will not be able to do unless you are in the moment. People throw the term around ‘being in the moment’ too much…Not many often realise how hard it can be. Try right now to focus on your ceiling for 1 minute without thinking at all. Hard right? I often go to The Buddhist Centre near where i live to practice Meditation, i could probably focus on my ceiling for hours if i wanted to. But i would get horny at some point or hungry for peanut butter so i would probably stop. Anyway, a nice and quick way to help you get into the moment is something i call Sense to Sense. You simply focus on each sense for about 5-10 seconds, moving from one to the other. So you would focus on what you can see for 10 seconds then focus on what you can hear and so on. Repeat this twice for each sense, notice if you feel any different.

This is great before you go out to a club. Or if you are in the club and getting nervous…go to the toilet for a moment, go into the stall and do this.

Third Tip

Do something productive that you are uncomfortable doing.

The problem…with YOU right now….is that everything you are doing, you are comfortable doing. Hell thats why you do it, you find it easy and auto-piloted, unconscious even.  But at the same time, the reason you are in this community is because everything you are comfortable doing is not getting you happiness and more women. The best thing you will ever hear if you haven’t heard it already is “If you do what you have always done, you will get what you have always got”…Hell fucking yeah!! So make it a point to every day or night you go out to practice doing something you are uncomfortable doing. The best way to know what to choose is to make a list of what guys who get loads of girls do regularly, imagine yourself doing each one…and whatever ones give you that negative feeling when you think about it….put a * next do it AND FUCKING DO IT AS OFTEN AS POSSIBLE!!!

Ok  im gona stop here before i ramble on too much, anyway, follow those 3 tips and let me or Matt know how it all goes down. Just remember….inner game is about making everything you feel come from within. Society has us believe that how we feel should be based on how we look and how people treat us…FUCK THAT…How you feel should come from within, end of. Think positively, think happy, you will be happy. Dont let idiot little girls or guys make you feel bad, you choose it!!

Sam Ben-David
sam@howtochangelifenow.com

Sam Ben-David is a Blogger, Speaker and Do-er, to find out more about Sam, go to his blog www.howtochangelifenow.com.

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